Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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