I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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