After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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