Sry I called you an 8
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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