Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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