my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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