i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.