I like my sex mixed with concussions.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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