Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
