me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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