so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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