oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
