i just wanna soil my oats bro
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
