why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
