Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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