nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
