so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
