Texts From Last Night

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  (563): View more from Iowa

  whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.

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  (563): whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend. http://tfl.nu/jypi
  Replies (72) Good night (5291) Bad night (685)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.

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  (703): in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry. http://tfl.nu/nber
  Replies (2) Good night (4269) Bad night (716)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."

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  (508): right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy." http://tfl.nu/262w
  Replies (21) Good night (6633) Bad night (1537)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?

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  (614): Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team? http://tfl.nu/idfg
  Replies (12) Good night (3665) Bad night (1241)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.

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  (204): We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party. http://tfl.nu/tsig
  Replies (3) Good night (2480) Bad night (575)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?

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  (780): Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem? http://tfl.nu/k3dz
  Replies (4) Good night (3146) Bad night (710)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.

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  (920): Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be. http://tfl.nu/nyya
  Replies (2) Good night (1332) Bad night (661)
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  (619): View more from California

  Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.

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  (619): Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates. http://tfl.nu/i6q4
  Replies (4) Good night (1715) Bad night (468)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.

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  (402): Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord. http://tfl.nu/2tip
  Replies (9) Good night (417) Bad night (1074)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL

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  (217): Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL http://tfl.nu/5sam
  Replies (7) Good night (1444) Bad night (513)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...

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  (512): I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair... http://tfl.nu/zi5i
  Replies (16) Good night (752) Bad night (1575)
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  (315): View more from New York

  im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.

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  (315): im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass. http://tfl.nu/ll9k
  Replies (4) Good night (560) Bad night (884)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea

  (214): View more from Texas

  WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO

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  (214): Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea (214): WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO http://tfl.nu/eu05
  Replies (2) Good night (1724) Bad night (412)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt

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  (717): im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt http://tfl.nu/5q8i
  Replies (5) Good night (461) Bad night (541)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce

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  (404): I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce http://tfl.nu/fuvv
  Replies (8) Good night (1175) Bad night (367)

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