This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
