What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
