white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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