I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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