so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
