He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
