Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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