whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.