Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
