I need help removing her.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
