on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
