he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I have feelings that need drinking.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
