I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
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He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
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it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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