am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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