went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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