Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize