At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
