Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
