I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
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