Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize