i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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