Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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