i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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