i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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