he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
