just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
