We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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