You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
