you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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