You just made me feel so damn special
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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