So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
