Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
